Anal erotic play for men can make some ears ring. Toxic masculinity has birthed a society that frowns on the idea of the autoerotic man. It’s taboo enough to masturbate the old-fashioned way with your cock in hand, bring up the topic of anal stimulation, and many cis straight men may shut down. Phrases like “That’s gay” are common. It might be wishful thinking that demystifying the male g-spot or the p-spot will bring less adventurous men around to the pleasure within, but we are going to give it the old college try anyway.

During the 2020 global lockdown we had a lot of time to ourselves. Many sex toy sellers reported an increase in purchases of prostate massagers and many going to straight men. In the Mashable article The Great Prostate Rush of recent, Coyote Amrich, director of purchasing for all Babeland, Camouflage, and Good Vibrations sex stores, says that “the growth in prostate stimulation and products geared towards the prostate is largely made up of heterosexual cis-gendered men.” Forrest Andrews, a product developer at Aneros explains “Based upon a number of polls in our user forum and our own internal research, we determined our” largely male “customer demographic hovers around 62 percent heterosexual.”

To say that prostate stimulation is purely a gay or bisexual activity is similar to saying that female clitoral stimulation is lesbian. At one point in western history this was true and female masturbation was stigmatized. Luckily women have taken back their right to their sexuality and what it means to them. Is it possible for men to do the same?

Particularly in men, anal play is a rewarding experience. Men have a prostate, which is a gland located just beneath the bladder and above the penis. It produces the liquid that mixes with semen when men ejaculate. There are nerve endings in the male anus, rectum, and prostate that are activated during orgasm. This goes to reason that by stimulating these nerves some men can orgasm without the need for traditional masturbation of the penis. Men can also stimulate their prostate and the surrounding area to have an even more intense, powerful, and full body orgasm if they go the traditional masturbatory route. Let’s take it a step further and imagine actual penetrative sex with a partner, mixed with anal stimulation, and that may be the zenith of male erotic pleasure.

There are health benefits to prostate massage as well. Being aware of prostate heath is a common medical practice for men 40 years and above, with prostate examinations beginning around this time. Doctors used prostate massages to help monitor overall prostate health, treat prostatitis, and diagnose cancer. The leading prostate massager manufacturer Aneros began its journey through this practice in the early nineties, developing an at home prostate massager allowing men to massage their prostate without having to visit the doctor’s office. As men started to report their experiences, Aneros was expanded and marketed toward erotically inclined consumers. It’s worth mentioning that research has also found that men suffering from erectile dysfunction can benefit from prostate stimulation in helping to achieve erections when they had trouble before.

If you’re still on the fence, there is a technique that can stimulate your prostate without penetration. Applying pressure to the perineum (the area between the scrotum and the anus), can activate some of the nerves associated with the prostate. This won’t provide the same intense stimulation as actual contact but it’s a start and a good way to see if you may experience pleasure, you weren’t aware of.

In the early days of prostate sex toys, cultural stigma created a slow climb in its popularity. That said, since 2010 there has been a steep climb in normalizing anal play. And in 2020 a large rise due to more time on our hands and idle fingers, so to say.

Traditionally, cis heterosexual men have been more willing to explore their sexuality with a partner in a relationship. Enlisting said partner to help in your exploration is a great way to embrace the possibilities of anal play. All the same, more and more straight men are turning to sex toys in their solo experimentation and pleasure seeking.

Sexuality is a personal thing and if it’s not for you that’s okay and perfectly normal. It’s still worth keeping our minds open and asking the question, am I not doing this because of what other’s might think or because it’s something I really don’t want to do?

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